Discernment Counseling in Oklahoma & North Carolina
When a couple is at a crossroads, it can be difficult to know which way to turn. Discernment Counseling is specifically designed for mixed-agenda couples, where one partner is leaning out of the relationship and feeling ambivalent about therapy, while the other is leaning in and eager to work on the marriage. This approach helps both partners gain clarity, confidence, and understanding about their relationship before committing to a path forward.
Who Discernment Counseling is For
Discernment Counseling is ideal for couples who are uncertain about the future of their marriage. It’s not about fixing every problem or immediately changing the relationship. Instead, it provides a structured, supportive process to explore whether repair is possible and what next steps feel right for both partners.
Goals of Discernment Counseling
Through Discernment Counseling, you can expect to:
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Gain clarity about the direction to take for your marriage.
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Build confidence in your decision, no matter the chosen path.
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Deepen understanding of what has happened in the marriage and each person’s individual contributions to the challenges.
Possible Outcomes
At the conclusion of Discernment Counseling, you may decide to follow one of three paths:
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Path 1: Stay in the marriage “as-is” – Continue the marriage without major changes for now.
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Path 2: Divorce or separation – Move towards ending the marriage in a thoughtful and intentional way.
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Path 3: Six-month all-out effort with couples therapy – Engage in 6 months of couples therapy with divorce off the table to see if reconciliation is possible, focusing fully on repair and connection.
Format and Structure
Discernment Counseling is typically offered in 5 sessions, each lasting 1.5 hours. Every session follows a structured choreography:
Couple Time → Individual Time → Quick Summary → Individual Time → Summary & Wrap-Up
Session 1: The initial couple time lasts 30–40 minutes, with individual times lasting approximately 15-20 minutes.
Sessions 2–5: The couple time at the start is brief (about 5 minutes), allowing most of the session to focus on individual reflection (approximately 40 minutes each).
During the process, you and your partner are reminded that the goal is not to solve your problems immediately, but to gain clarity on whether change is possible and which direction to take.
Virtual & In-Person Options
Discernment Counseling is available virtually in Oklahoma and North Carolina, with in-person sessions offered in Oklahoma City/Edmond.
Pricing
Discernment Counseling sessions are $170 per 1.5-hour session. The total cost depends on how many sessions are needed, typically ranging from 1 to 5 sessions.
Frequently Asked Questions About Discernment Counseling
How many sessions will we need?
Most couples complete 1 to 5 sessions. The exact number depends on the complexity of your situation and how quickly you gain clarity about next steps.
Is Discernment Counseling the same as couples therapy?
No. Discernment Counseling focuses on deciding whether to pursue couples therapy. It is not designed to immediately solve relationship problems but to provide clarity on the best path forward.
Can we do sessions online?
Yes. Sessions are available virtually in both Oklahoma and North Carolina, offering flexibility for couples in any location.
What if one partner is unsure about attending?
Discernment Counseling is specifically designed for mixed-agenda couples, where one partner is leaning out. The process ensures both partners’ perspectives are heard and explored safely.
What happens after Discernment Counseling?
Couples leave with clarity, confidence, and understanding, whether that means pursuing therapy, staying as-is, or moving toward separation. Your therapist will work with you to create a thoughtful plan depending on what path you choose.
Locations:
Oklahoma:
3408 NW 178th St
Edmond, OK 73012​
North Carolina:
Virtual​
Our Mission:
Helping you and
your relationships flourish.
